Golden Sun for GBA is a very, very, very good game.

BUY IT NOW!!!!!

Erm... Sorry. I'm sorta addicted to it at the moment. ^_^

Hehe! I write about Subway, and then my dad comes in and asks what I want from Subway for dinner. (Naturally I didn't tell him I had Subway for lunch. I'm evil that way. ^_^)

Subway is the best fast food chain ever.

Really. They have great meatball subs, and I haven't met a person who dislikes Subway yet.

Today, I wen ton a feild trip with 29 other Drama Club members, Hancy (Geh...), and Ms. Snyder, who's taking over direction of the plays from Hancy, with Ms. Derose, and who is now directing the musicals, as that's the Choir teacher's job. She's actually pretty cool. (She's new this year, was in the band, and is aware of Hancy's good directing techniques and her bad. There's no way she could have not been taught by Hancy, so that's good.)

We went to Cleveland to see a production of The Pirates of Penzance. It could've been better, but I liked it.

It was extremely hard to hear the actors, and when more than one set of lyrics were being sung at the same time, you couldn't understand either.

But there were a lot of good parts, too. The school's going to be hearing a lot of "A paradox, a paradox, a quite ingenious paradox, ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, a par--a--dox!" Over the next week or so. Or in the case of Toft and Kelli Kaufmann, "A pair of ducks, a pair of ducks, [Duck noises that fit the Ah-ha-ha-etc...], a pair -- of -- ducks!" ^_^

And the trip itself wasn't bad. I sat by Eric (^_^), and th people I was by are just fun people to be around.

And then we ate at Subway on the way home.

Happy Dance Time!

/^.^/l^.^l\^.^\l^.^l/^.^/l^.^l\^.^\l^.^l/^.^/l^.^l\^.^\l^.^l

**Pose**

Happy Dance!

Yeah!

**Rockettes do Happy Dance behind Fox**

**Sees Rockettes, shrugs** 'Tis the season, I guess.

Pff is such a cool word...

Anyway, I suppose I should write about what's been bugging me lately...

For about a week now, every time I try to go to sleep at night, I want someone there with me. Preferrably Eric, but someone. I don't know why, either. I cuddled a stuffed animal for the first time in ages.

And I need human contact. I've gone without touching someone else, intentionally or not, for so long that I suddenly started needing it. And I'm not getting any, which really sucks. Just shaking hands would be fine, but I went all of yesterday without touching anyone else, and all of today so far.

Am I really so deprived? Or did my acknowlegement of being gay break down a shell I'd put up to myself? I know that everyone I come in contact with in my daily non-online life sees a shell, and if they manage to get past that, there's a second shell. I don't know when I put them up, or why, but they've been up forever. Nobody noticed that I was depressed. 'Course, they don't notice when I'm not either, because I'm such an introvert offline, but that's not the point.

And I just... I don't know, but I'm starting to get depressed again... And I want to say something to Eric so much, but I've committed myself to waiting for band camp, so that's really bugging me.

And of course, on top of this, there's something else. Naturally. (Pff.)

There's this girl I know, and I talk to her a lot more than I do anyone else offline, except maybe Eric, because I tend to babble a little worse when he's around, and we have a lot in common.

So today I realized that had I any attraction to her beyond freindship, it'd probably work. But of course, I'm not. When fate finally hands me a girl who'd go out with me, I'm not interested. How typical. Of course, our friendship is on about the same level as mine and Eric's, so I really hope that he's not entirely straight. And sometimes, just what he says and how he says it, it doesn't seem entirely impossible that he's not gay.

But, that's enough from me. I think.

Has anyone else noticed how my posts are getting longer?

Book report (really a summary) = done!

It wasn't hard, but The oddest thing is that I wrote 562 words without padding it. And 500 words was supposed to be the limit. Of course, I can't shorten it without losing the... not-badness of the paper...

I don't think Hancy'll mind too much, I usually under-write.

Appareantly, you don't need to understand the philosophy or psychology behind an author's theses to understand all of them...

Odd...

Pff.

I've got a 350-word book report due tomorrow. Not a bad assignment, but I chose a very bad book to do. Ah well. Won't take too long.

I suppose I should give you my opinion of the Harry Potter movie.

It was good. Could've been better, but it was good, given that it was already two and a half hours long. I liked the slight change of the zoo scene, having Dudley fall into the snake's habitat as it left,then the glass coming back. Dudley deserved it. Especially book Dud;ey. Movie Susley was cruel, but wasn't given enough time onscreen to be as bratty or cruel as book Dudley.

I feel sorry for movie Neville. He was hardly there. He had his important part for getting points for the house cup, but the impact of it is somewhat lost when we don't know that he's dismal in all his classes and such. The only thing we know he's bad at is flying.

And Almost no actual learning was shown, and we don't even know what McGonagall teaches. That was kinda upsetting. I was looking forward to seeing the first-years starting to try magic and not really doing well, and I wasnted to see some of the stuff they did.

Snape's class was almost completely cut, so we didn't get much of Snape's... Snape-ness.

I thought quidditch was interesting in the books, but the movie showed me just why it's the big wizarding sport. I'd kill to play quidditch just once.

And Oliver Wood is hot! He's the first person to warrant fanboy reaction from me. And quite deservedly so, mind you. He's hot, has a Scottish accent, struggled to contain a bludger while in tight pants, thereby giving a nice view of his ass... etc.

But that's quite different from my Eric-hanyaan, so don't think I've given up there.

Back to the movie, they cut Hermione finding the right potions at the end. They compensated by slightly changing the devil's snare scene into a Hermione success worthy of 50 points, and moved the joke at Hermione's expence ("ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?") to one at Ron's expense. ("Good thing I didn't panic." Watch the movie if you don't understand.)

Voldemort tempting Harry was a good addition. Doesn't change the characters at all, but it show's Voldemort's evilness well.

I can't wait for the next movie. (And book.)

Oh yeah, I've still got the main reccurring theme stuck in my head. The movie had some very good music.

Also new in my life is my decision that as soon as my older brother goes to college, I'm going to come out at school. If he weren't in school now where the information would reach him, which I don't want it to do, seeing as how he's a somewhat bigoted bastard at times, I'd already be out.

I'm thinking band camp will be a good time, unless he goes to a college with a really late (relative) start of courses, like OSU. I'll at least have that weight off my chest. I'll probably still have the Eric thing, but at least people'll know I'm gay.

Well... It sorta didn't matter wether my grandparents had an internet connection or not. NEver really had time to use it. ^_^

Thursday, family was coming all day, my grandma needed help in the kitchen (she started dinner before breakfast...), and I only get to see most of these people once a year.

Friday, I went and saw Harry Potter, after sleeping in until noon, and then I had to leave my grandparents. We had to stop at a wedding that was somewhat out of the way on our way home. I'm not sure why my whole family went, only my dad knew people there... And I just got home, so once I get settled, you'll hear more.

Just letting you know I'm here. ^_^

Well, I'm at my grandparents' house now...

Whee.

I'm going up to my grandparent's house up in New York today. My family goes there every Thanksgiving, and it's fun. My brothers and I get our birthday presents for the year from one of our uncles because he dicided not to try to remember our birthdays. Plus, that's where we read our Christmas lists to the rest of the family. This year, Escaflowne uncut dub tapes, Gamecube, and Taboo are definitely going to be on the list.

I should be there tonight. And they do have an internet connection, so I'll be able to update the blog while there.

Quote of the Day: (I warn you, it's really long because the QotD has been forgotten for so long.)

Bookid9997: YAY! Elusion's a knight!

And hi.
HarlequinShadow: "Majikku whispered the spell and all of her energy went into Kasai, Kasai then looked over at Majikku, who was on the ground snoring."

There is so much wrong with that...o_O;;; **makes a face** Can Crono-san do that?

And hi!
Bookid9997: Well... Kasai's better...
HarlequinShadow: Well, yeah...but...O_o I dunno, it just seems wrong. Maybe it's just me, because I enjoy watching my characters suffer.

Kyuudou and Kasai: Oh, gee, thanks. ._.
HarlequinShadow: But yay, Elusion's a knight!

Kasai: **dances around joyfully** @_@
Bookid9997: That took a while...
HarlequinShadow: Yeah, considering how long he's actually been around with us. Ah well, he's now officially a knight, and that makes me happy.

Kasai: **really big heart-shaped eyes**

Kyuudou: We get it already! **bops Kasai**
Bookid9997: Fox: **Sees Elusion** **Really big heart shaped eyes** (Only 'cause he's cute. Technically, I haven't met him. And no, I don't really think that, Anne, it's just a setup for)

Kasai: NO! MINE!!!! **Baps Fox**
HarlequinShadow: Anne: Catfight!

Kyuudou: O_o;;;

Anne: ^_^;
Bookid9997: Fox: HEY! I AM NOT A GIRL!! I'M JUST GAY!!!

**Baps Anne**

Kyuudou: Glad I'm not involved.

Kasai: **Lost bapee, so baps Kyuudou**

Kyuudou: Oww.. Spoke to soon.
HarlequinShadow: Anne: **baps Tokage**

Tokage: What did I do now?!

Anne: I don't know, but I bet you had it coming...
Bookid9997: Tokage: Oh. Well then. **Baps Lance and Zach**
HarlequinShadow: Kasai: **baps Lance**

Kyuudou: When in Rome...**baps Zach**
Bookid9997: Maker: **Baps Kyuudou** Don't bap strangers!

Zach: **Tries to bap Tokage, baps Maker instead**

Kyuudou: **Represses snerk-ed-ness** **Is bapped by Lance**
HarlequinShadow: Anne: Bap Wars! **baps Tokage**

Tokage: **attempts to bap Anne, almost hits Kasai**

Kasai: **ducks**

Tokage: **smacks Fighter**

Fighter: Hey! How did I get involved?!
Bookid9997: 8-bit Fighter: Swords!

Black Mage: **Baps 8-bit so hard he flies back into 8-bit world** Sorry. I meant to kill him.

Fox: 'S OK. **Is bapped by Anne** HEY! **Baps Shirogi**

Shiro: **Tries to bap-back Fox, baps Healer** This room is way too crowded...
HarlequinShadow: Anne: **is bapped by Fox, and then finds someone's knee in her side** Ow! Hey!

Tokage: Sorry. Well, no I'm not, but whatever...
Bookid9997: Fox: **Is shoved into Elusion** Umm... Hi?

Kasai: Oh, no you don't! Come on, dolphin-boy! **Drags Elusion off to God knows where**

Zach and Lance: **Sneak out**

Tokage: Hey! Get back here you cowards! **Runs after them**

Shiro: I gotta go. I've got a girl who asked me to be on top.

Majikku: **Appears** **Slaps Shiro** ECCHI! **Dissappears**

Shiro: **Dissappears after her**

Starlights and Kyuudou: **In bap wars, which move them away**

Fox: That was odd...
HarlequinShadow: Anne: Agreed...

-- Anne and I talking online. To understand who the people are, go to Battle of the Crowns RPG. That'll explain Shiro, Kasai, Tokage, Lance, Zach, and Majikku. Healer, Fighter, and Maker are the Sailor Starlights from the Sailorstars season of Sailormoon. Kyuudou is an invention of Anne's for MDBN. 8-bit Fighter and Black mage are from 8-bit Theater, a webcomic. It's fun to involve fictional characters when speaking to a freind online. Anne and I do it all the time.

All US History classes watched "Glory" today in the auditorium.

Good movie, that is.

Plus, I got out of thre classes, one being English. I was also glad to get out of keyboarding, because I can type fine, and don't really care to format reports.

Back to "Glory," there was a nice suble makeup effect that I don't know if anyone else noticed, but at the beginning of the movie, Shaw looks young, inexperienced, somewhat naive, and a little cute. By the end of the movie he looks... sorta ragged, somehow older, like he's been through hell. And not as cute.

And then I found out he was played by Matthew Broderic, and am kicking myself for ever finding him cute, because I've seen the "Inspector Gadget" movie.

My school needs Honors History. Badly.

The department head thinks that mixing honors and non-honors students will speed up the non-honors students.

It doesn't. At all. All it does is slow down the honors students and annnoy me when we get put into groups for projects.

For example, this past weekend I was working on a Powerpoint presentation as part of the classwork. We did them in groups. I did most of the work, willingly. I put together the presentation, and wrote out the notes to read as it was presented. OR at least I will. It's due next Monday.

In the class time we were given, one of the other group members actually worked. She found good websites for information on our topic, and maps. It was a big help. One of the other group members gave me a couple sentence fragments which I couldn't use, thinking he was helping. I don't even remember who the last member of my group is, he did so little. (Read: nothing)

How fun...

**Fanfare**

THE PLAY IS OVER!!!!!

Now I have lotsa time to talk to Shadow-chan during the week, to do homework, to do... stuff...

The cast party was fun, but it would've been better if Eric'd played Twister, too... But he was busy.

I hardly saw him, but that's kinda good, 'cause the more I see him outside of Math and Latin, the worse things are.

I figure it like this: when I talk to him in Math and Latin, it's like having a small glass of wine. It's good, but there's no serious repercussions for doing it. The more exposure I have to him, the worse my "hangover" is. Thus, marching season and the play being over, I don't have much contact with him outside of Math and Latin, so I should be fine for the time being.

^_^

I didn't get back from the cast party until after 1 AM, and I stil had to get the gray spray-in hair color out. And I had to be at BG-Firelands by 8 AM for the Holiday Bowl (Academic Challenge). It was fun, though. Lost only one (of six) matches, so we got second. Lost the one match by one point. (We were tied going into the last question.)

"What ocean is the Berence (Or is it Barence? We only hear the questions...) Sea adjacent to?"

Don't answer. We already know. We just didn't then.

Feh.

Well, opening night is over, and tonight's the last performance.

Thank God.

I have grown to hate this play **Gets Mrs. White-ish** so much, it's like- burning feeling... Flames! Flames on the.. on the sides.. Sides of my- my- it's- I-

**Back to normal**

Basically, I hate this play. I may enjoy watching it sometime, but I will never be able to act in it again. Even if for some odd reason I auditioned and got George or Doc Gibbs.

Cast party is tonight. Same place Pre-state was. Just with fewer people. Which is good. It was a tad crowded at Pre-state.

And Eric will be there. ^_^

I suppose last night was okay, performancewise, but it could've been better. There was a really late entrance, and Hancy never really taught us to improv, so it was really obvious...

So um... Yeah.^

Director-bitch is my English teacher, and your grade in her class is 95% wether she likes you or not, 3% your actual work grade, and 2% not there.

And she doesn't like you if you don't amuse her (hard to do) or don't at least try to get in the play. And even then, she might hate you, as seen in my previous post.

(It's not like she even has a reason to dislike the girl... she tries, has talent, and only bitches when she has reason to...)

Thankfully, she's retiring from directing after this year (and I think teaching, but I'm not sure...), and her replacement(s) are cool.

And the main replacement is also part of the English dept. The other one may only have been there to see how she should direct the musicals, as that's the chior director's job, and she's new.

Dress reahearsal last night.

I tell ya, you can't work on this play for too long, or you hate it. A dress rehearsal where the director decides to skip intermissions for time doesn't help when you're on at the very end of act two, and the very beginning of act three, but you have a costume change betweent he two and have to find another "dead" person to trade coats because costume crew had switched them before, and nobody figured it out until one of us got our costume.

So I go onstage still buttoning the coat, which looks really bad during the whole third act because the collar was up, and I couldn't fix it because it would be too much motion for a "dead" person.

Also, I have kinda long hair, which is somewhat curly making it "big."

It wan't really big before, I found out, because Prof. Willard is supposed to have Einstein-ish hair because I didn't want to cut mine, so they tried just messing it up, but it turned into a foot-in-any-direction-from-my-head mass of hair. Which was then onl;y partially turned gray, because the gray stuff is expensive, and they have to fully gray my hair twice.
And the peron who plays Mrs. Soames had a college visit yesterday, and the college gave her nothing to excuse her absence, so she was technically not allowed to go to dress rehearsal.

When she did, Mrs. Hancy, the moron that she is, bitched at her.

Because she cane when she didn't have to.

And her absence's non-exusedness wan't her fault.

Mrs. Hancy is evil incarnate, and I 'm happy beyond expression that she will not be directing after this year.

^_^

Spaghettios cans are evil.

Spaghettios are good, especially with meatballs, but I cut my hand twice on the same Spaghettios can!

It's a conspiracy!

Next thing you know, the milk jugs will be after me! ^_~

Ne, ne, I'm sane.

What?

Sometimes I feel like I'm a part of a really bad sci-fi show...

Eric logged off before I could say anything, and then tonight I had chinese food. (Lemon chicken. Yum! ^_^)

So, I'm stealing leftover fortune cookies, and thinking about what to do about the whole Eric thing. You know, do I say anyythin, if I say anything, what do I say, do I get him alone or talk in front of freinds, do I talk in person or online, what'll his reaction be., etc...

So I start eating the fortune cookies.

"You have a potential urge and the ability for accomplishment."

Well, the urge isn't potential, it's here... But It's nice to know that I have the ability for accomplishment. Kinda spookily applicable.

"Failure is the mother of success."

Obviously, I'm afraid he'll reject me on both the hanyaan level, as well as on a freind level. Perhaps if he does immediately, he'll start thinking and eventually change his mind? With the last one, I'm feeling quite a bit... odd.

"You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems."

Are you getting thew same message I am? All three of the messages apply, especially together, and they seem to be teeling me to do something, rather than just sit with the feelings and not do anythign about them.

That, combined with the fact that deja vu has become such a regular thing for me that I don't even really feel wierded out by it at all makes me wonder if the characters of fictional stories presented in any media here on Earth actually live somewhere...

Anyway, I'm definitely doing something about the whole Eric thing, but I can't figure out what exactly...

Y'know...

Nobody from my school reads this now, except maybe hanyaan-guy...

But it seem's like he knows I gethanyaan around him anyway...

So all you strangers who won't know who he is get to find out that hanyaan-guy is Eric Morse.

I told you that his name is shorter than hanyaan-guy. A lot, really, since I'm only going to use "Eric" from now on.

Hm. He's online now. Should I tell him to read my blog?

Band Apprecciation parties are fun! ^_^

Bowling and poeple and fun-ness...

And opportunities to glomp hanyaan-guy without him thinking anything of it.

Which I totally missed, but they were there. That's the important thing.

I just thought of something.

IF YOU GO TO MY SCHOOL, POST A COMMENT!!!!!!!!

I want to know if I can use hanyaan-guy's name, since it's shorter than "hanyaan-guy." If anybody who actually knows who he is reads this, I'm not using his name.

Heather & Shannon, I'm gonna ask you at school, so I don't know why I'm giving you warning....

Fox-kun baka no desu!

What is it with me and having dreams that are weird, yet set in a completely normal Earth setting with only humans in them? And humans I know, at that.

The only part of the dream I really remember is the part where I was out on my driveway playing some sort of solitaire, and then I start another game, and somehow, hanyaan-guy had appeared. I think it happened logically in the dream, but I don't remember now. Anyway, the cards I was using all of a sudden had pictures of guys kissing in the center, instead of the normal 7 clubs on the 7 of clubs, and whatnot. (I might add that they were rather attractive guys, too. ^_^) So, dream hanyaan-guy sees this, and he's like "Oh, you're gay." and I just shrugged, and went back to flipping the cards over and putting them in a pile, instead of doing any normal solitaire game, because dreams are weird like that.

After that, there was thunder, and it started raining, so everyone (there were a lot of other people on the driveway now, for some reason) gathered their stuff, and we went into my garage. But I left the cards on the driveway on purpose, though I forget now what my reason was for doing that... (And hanyaan-guy dissappeared for the rest of the dream, presumably he was in the garage, but not where I could see him.) Then, we heard people out on the street I live on, and it turned out to be a couple of the freshman girls in the band whose names I never learned. So we let them in the garage, and eventually it stops raining, and I forget the rest of the dream. I'm sure I've forgotten parts of what I remembered, too... but, um... yeah.

Derams are stupid.

State's over.

We got a two.

A two is good, yes, but well... We've been getting ones since before I was born. Nobody really knows how to react yet, and we've had almost a day since it was announced. It's really kind of depressing.

Thenkfully, it's not pushing me back into my earlier depression. But...

At least next year, when I yell at freshmen to fix something small, I have a really good reason to, not just "It should be done because it's wrong."

I do feel a little sorry for next year's freshman though, because they're going to be pushed even harder than they would be in a normal year, and they'll have been told whay, but they won't really know, because they heven't been in band to know what state is like, and they won't know the feeling we got after getting at two after 17 years of ones. (Which is really hard to do, mind you. We're the only band in our class to have gotten 13 ones in the last 13 years. There are only full state records for the past 13 [now 14] years, so we can't compare farther back.)

Anyway, I'll just kinda... yeah.

*_* <--- Me, with residual pre-state band party happiness.

It was really funn, can't really put it in words, though.

This year's party was a lot better than last years, cause there was actually stuff to do. Foosball, pool, Nintendo, there were people playing music with all the instuments that the people whose house it was' had. (Non-marching instruments, mind you. NOne of us are that big band geeks...) It was funn.

Then we went and made it "snow" at one of the band director's house. We had more'n two car trunks full of "snow." I say "snow" 'cause I feel like confusing those not privy to Perkins High School marching band tradition.

And hanyaan-guy was there, as well as people who share my sense of humor, so, um... yeah.

Updating comment scripts so that they work again. Hope it worked.

Eep.

Somehow I managed to double-post...

And all the old comments are gone... *Sniff*

(Edited after comments were upgraded, despite the fact that the comment upgrade post is after this. Just making sure I don't confuse you...)

Yep. It's photosute.

Version 4.0, platinum edition!

Yay-ness!

@_@

(That's starting to become a trademark opening. I should probably stop. Oooh! I know!)

Scratch the @_@!

*_* <--- Me, with stars in my eyes.

My dad just got Photosuite (I think. All those similar-sounding names confuse me...), so I'll be able to do layouts eventually and let some of the work off of Shadow-chan.

Shadow-chan, note that I said eventually... ^_^

HAPPY!